On a tour in Australia, I did a Workshop called “Sensual, Spiritual Sex,” and the whole thing was based on sensual intimacy that didn’t revolve around intercourse*. What does it take to achieve sensual fulfillment? Should we strive for sensuality or sexuality? Is it possible for each of these desires to be mutually fulfilled? In many ways, thinking about sex in terms of sensuality is an upgrade over just “sex.”
Naturally I’m all about sharing the energetics, the Consciousness, the formless first, and then the form, so here’s the main energetic:
When your Consciousness shifts, so will the experience of sex and sensuality. The obsessive desire for sex in our culture comes from the combination of the powerful natural instinct to procreate and the suppressed experience of everything about sex. Sex is extremely and highly repressed in almost every culture in the world. Why? The fear and judgment around sex is control-originated. Governments, religions, churches, cults…If you want to control people, what’s the best way to do it? Make them feel guilty about who they are. There’s nothing more natural than sex. It’s built into the DNA of 99% of all humans. That’s just how species procreate. That’s how they live on. That’s DNA. Have sex, have sex.
It’s different than in humanity, but in nature the strongest male’s seed is spread most often and most widely and successfully. So nature changes and works through DNA. And humans are a part of that DNA. We’re not the same as other animals, but we are animals. Your soul is not an animal, but humans are animals. This body is an animal. This body procreates. This body breathes air, eats food, drinks water and pisses/shits. This body lives on Earth as a physical being. And those physical things are built on that human code. So rather than trying to live in resistance to that, existence is actually much more peaceful, much more fulfilling and much more enjoyable when we begin to honor that. Almost all dysfunctional desire for sex is actually coming from the suppression of sex and an unfulfilled desire to be loved and to be touched and to be cared about. That type of intimacy comes in many ways, but because of the powerful stimulation, sex is associated and often confused with sensuality.
Sensuality begins from day one. When you’re born, you’re naked. You’re born naked!
Oh my god. Really?
Yeah. That’s profound.
You are born naked. And if you’re born in a natural setting, with a mother that gives a home birth, without drugs and all that kind of stuff, she’s probably going to be naked too. Totally naked. Hmm. . . a naked mother is giving birth to a naked child. The child is coming into this world with the most sensitive skin it will ever have. It can feel everything. It can feel the electricity in the air. So it’s like “Oooooo Ohhhhhhh Ahhhh…” All day long. It’s sensory saturation : )
I highly suggest consciously exploring and reliving the womb experience. It’s so beneficial, and anyone can do it. Just do it during your normal meditation, or if you don’t meditate, take the time out of your day. Close your eyes, take a few breaths to get in the zone, and then travel back . . . imagine what it was like being a small person, being a baby, and re-enter the womb.
You come into this world with the most sensitive skin you will ever have. A completely new experience! It might be cold, it might be hot, it might be dry, there’s electricity in the air, etc. But you are coming in as a sensual being, meaning from the first moment, it’s all about feeling. Within minutes that child is sucking on her mother’s breast. That is extremely sensual. So sensual in fact, I don’t know anything more sensual than breast feeding. To me that is sensuality. And if that’s true, it means it’s extremely available to everyone. It’s built into life from day one.
Why would it ever leave?
Naturally it wouldn’t! Ideally we would grow up and stay sensual beings! And yet there’s doubt. The majority are not living a sensual life. Not even close. There may be small moments of sensuality, but even those are totally numbed by the suppression of feeling and the defenses in place.
Children are being born and they’re not even breastfeeding at all. They’re sucking on a plastic polyurethane nipple. And so many children are born in hospitals – into a cold, sterile, harsh environment, with bright lights, metal, and among stressed-out, money-driven humans. They’re being taken away from the mother for hours or days, not even seeing her. Children come into this world and Bam! Chastised with the whip. That becomes the relationship with life! From the first day, that’s the relationship with the world!
Now it doesn’t mean that healing can’t take place. Anything is possible. Any wound can be healed. Any wrong can be forgiven. But we have to be aware of how that works, of what damage has been done, of what scars and trauma there are. With deep-seated suppression comes dysfunctional normalcy. Its been that way for so long it just appears normal and there is little to no awareness or questioning of the reality at all. So there must be awareness of what is before healing can take place.
The solution isn’t about starting clubs for sensuality, not about making resolutions, setting rules. It isn’t about doing something. Doing happens naturally, manifesting with shifts in Consciousness. As Consciousness shifts, our lives change. Noticing the conditioning, being at peace with the suppression, the control, and the manipulation that took place is the first step.
You are a sensual being at birth, you could also be a sensual being at the age of ten. You could be a sensual being at age 13, at 30, and until your body no longer works for sensuality anymore.
Your being, mindset, attitude, and energetic resonance is continually crystallizing. And it’s either in manipulation, abuse, suppression, fear, and judgment or it’s happening in authenticity, peace, and love. The child is being born into the world of the parent. Coming from pure potential, born into a world of fear. Fear not just of sex and sensuality, but of freedom, telling the truth, telling a lie. People are scared of telling the truth and of telling lies. You can’t tell them the truth because they don’t like the truth and you can’t tell a lie because they judge you for being a liar.
You just naturally continue on that path. Almost everyone you have ever known has also been that way because almost everyone went to school. 100% of the people in that school were not sensual either. There are no classes where everyone gives each other massages. There is no hot bath and incense break. You didn’t have lunch café where you had pudding and you spread it on each other’s bodies. Or after football practice you took a popsicle and rubbed it on your brother’s chest. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. None of that happens in school. So when you grow up, not only has that been your family life, it’s also been the life accepted as standard and normal. You get a job and it’s the same way. Everyone has to wear clothes. “No relationships in the workplace.” Everyone pretends not to be sexual – use appropriate language and do not discuss anything controversial.
So to recapitulate: 99% of people are missing out on sensuality, even though they are sensual beings. Yet daily life is dictated by control, conditioning, and manipulation. The agenda is control. If you feel guilty about who you are, which you will if you want what’s bad, you will be easily controlled.
99% of people desire to have sex. And if they feel bad about it, if they feel guilty about it, they are controlled. Now they need salvation and redemption. They need forgiveness just to deal with natural, programmed thoughts and feelings. Now you need ‘me’. And who is ‘me’? ‘Me’ is the king. ‘Me’ is the priest. ‘Me’ is the pope. ‘Me’ is the shaman. ‘Me’ is whoever it is. The hook is in, the grip has a stronger and stronger hold.
If you feel confidant, conscious, honorable, then you’re in your power – you’re not going to agree to being controlled. You will think for yourself, ask questions and stand up for what is right.
This is the first in a multi-part New Paradigm series on sex and sensuality. Tune in to New Paradigm Eden for updates in the next few days.
*Speaking of “intercourse,” the word itself was not “sensual from day one.” For 250 years it existed as a term for “a [commercial] exchange” before it became innuendo.